Dear Jim, you're an ass, and a creep....which makes you a creepy asshole

Received this message from Jim last night. Thank you Jim for calling me a poor, desperate, lonely woman. But hey, at least I have the cute factor going for me, which you so kindly highlighted in caps. Were you yelling that Jim? Because I feel when people use caps they are yelling at me. Also, I would like to point out that nowhere in my profile to I address my alma mater nor associated mascot. Jim, I have no fucking clue what you are talking about and I could care less about my, yours, or Joe Biden's college mascot.

Your Alma mater mascot is NOT awesome, but...

I'll refrain from getting into my reasons for not agreeing with you, because A) I wouldn't know where to begin and B) I'm familiar with how ornery and defensive people can get with their beloved colleges.

So I was looking through all the ads here, thinking to myself, look at all the poor, desperate, lonely women. And then I saw your profile and thought to myself, hey, here's a poor, desperate, lonely woman that's actually CUTE. So I thought I'd write and see if you're as interesting on the inside as you are in your pictures.

Now, I think I might know what you're thinking at this point: I want, I need to know more about this guy, does he know the secret and meaning to life? Does he drive real fast and is he good in bed. Will he make me breakfast in bed? ALL THE TIME? But hold on, let’s slow down a minute: I'm not going to bare my soul to you--a stranger, potential stalker, and who knows what else--in an initial email. What, are you crazy? Would you do that?

This isn't a rhetorical question. I've just given you something interesting and provocative to talk about, without being too heavy or small talk-ish, and you can even throw in a story about a friend who did just this thing--at a bar, grocery store, whatever; doesn't have to be an email. It could even be, actually, about you, and I'd never know the difference. A sort of therapeutic, even cathartic release for you. You know, this way you could catch two birds with one stone.

You’re welcome

Jim

side note:  Jim has obviously been blocked from further contact with this twin!