Conquer Me

I love a funny guy. Who doesn’t though? True, a sense of humor is much like beauty- in the eye of the beholder… or in this case the laugh of the beholder… or is it the brain of the beholder? Whatever. You catch my drift. I recently dated a guy who looked great on paper- you know the guy: tall, dark, handsome, successful, no baby mama drama, dog, good style, blah blah blah. But there was something missing… he didn’t make me laugh. And that was that. Now, don’t get me wrong- I don’t need to be entertained all the time. In fact, I find when guys can’t turn it off it’s almost as bad as them not being able to turn it on. No bueno. 

Meet FunnyGuy. Not his name but he is, so let’s call him that. This is one of the two guys that I actually initiated contact with- he had an interesting photo of himself doing a sport not many people do, so I commented on that in an email. Short and sweet. He replied back with the following:

Hey XX (me),

me and my older bro should go on a date with you and your sister.

we need to hang out immediately chica. <he gave his phone # here>

Love <insert his town here>, but everyone knows that your hometown is second tier :)

Thanks for the props on the sport

I’m going to SF this weekend, but I’d love to spoil you at your local dive bar

You lookin forward to a solid weekend?

-FunnyGuy

I replied making reference to me possibly owning 26 cats (and threatening to drop them off at his house to babysit) and weighing 300 pounds and that I thought it was a bold move he gave me his phone number right off the bat. In addition to saying my sis and I have never gone on a double date (true) and that I was headed out of town for the weekend and could he possibly watch my cats. 

Here’s the kicker, I then gave him my number. Here is the text that came next:

Him: One of your 26 cats scratched my eye, now I look like a villain, much appreciated. Hope you had a good weekend XX (me).

Me: Blast! Damn cats- you can keep ‘em

Him: Keep em? I prefer training, grooming, clipping, and showcasing them for a small profit (in addition to the intrinsic value I derive).

Me: Funny Guy. Bueno.

I know, my responses are lack luster. But how do you take cat grooming to the next level?

Moral of the story- humor can take you a LONG LONG way.
As Napoleon said, “A woman laughing is a woman conquered.”
Funny, I wouldn’t peg him for the funny type.